What's your speed?

One thing you learn if you date enough, is that the speed in which relationships go, develop, unravel... does very much vary case by case. No two situations is ever the same. Be it circumstances, emotions, or purely just life, how things go is truly unique. No one way is the "right" way... and I'm only really learning this now. After many trips & falls, it's finally hitting me that we just never know how something will work out, solely based on it's beginnings or even it's middle. That what seems perfect isn't always the case. That some people prefer to do things faster because that's what works at the moment, while others take it very very slowly because that seems to work too.

We are driven by emotions but lead by logic. 

or at least we should be...

We move forward with things based on many factors, some lean towards emotion more than they do logic & vice versa. The reality of it is as long as something is progressing organically and not being dragged or pulled... all is well.

Or at least it should be.

Except that we live in a society where it's a lot easier to judge a situation from the outside than it is to reflect on our own decisions. I'm extremely guilty of this sometimes. My initial reaction is to judge a situation based on my own experiences, knowing that my perspective is altered by bias opinions, and also knowing I have no idea the ins & outs of anyone else situation, making my opinion quite invalid with no true substances except a few generalizations I've learned along the way.

Seeing people fall in love instantly always seemed questionable to me, but watching someone not progress in a 10 year relationship, well that too seems doubtful...so which one is it? Where is this happy medium everyone is seeking...  what is in fact that "Right" approach...

Then I realized, the right approach is the one that feels right... the one you continue to work towards, because it works for you. That Billy & Sally being engaged after a year of being together, doesn't mean Bob & Lindsay aren't doing well in their 5 year still novios relationship. It just means things are different... and they will be different, each & every time...

But different means nothing if they all feel right.

& if you don't know what "right" feels like, then this might not be it for you... look for right, which ever speed it might be....

xoxo
signs the girl looking for her speed...