Soooo...About that

I'm quite impulsive.
Very rarely do I take a breather & truly think things through. Mostly because I become engulfed and overwhelmed with emotion (only to shrug my shoulders a few hours later)... This causes a lot...A LOT... of issues on my day to day interactions.

I make rash decisions and make up my mind without a second thought...only to have 3 or four thoughts after.

I don't know how much I have to emphasize that I'm a walking/talking contradiction. My thoughts, actions and words are to not be trusted...because they never really align.

I'm not sure if it's because I lie to myself, or I'm truly just hiding my own feelings from other people.
Whatever it is... I need to take a chill pill.

I have successfully manage to do so in the work place. After a few hard learned life lessons, I realized my emotions have no place in corporate America. BUT when will I ever learn to chill out in real life? I naturally want to blame those around me. People cater to my ways, they react accordingly and accept I am how I am. Not helping me take genuine strides to change.

Except now, I'm truly attempting to make real changes. I want to pause for a second before I lash out. I want to take a minute to myself before I do things. I want the things I say to truly match what I feel and NOT just for that moment. I want the decisions I make to remain consistent throughout.

Basically... I need some consistency with my words & actions... I don't want my inconsistency to be the only consistent thing about me. I don't want the things I do to be taken lightly because they are seemingly passive (because truth is, they are in fact, passive)...

I need to figure this out, before my next contradiction.

xoxo
signs the inconsistent girl.