It's only now that I fully understand what people meant when they said
"You have to fully lose yourself, in order to find yourself"
Life happens to everyone, and everyone reacts differently and/or somewhat similarly.
In the last couple of years I was forced to shed many layers of skin. Experiencing things that I never thought "would be happening to me". Truth is, everyone goes through it, some worst than others, everyone though, to some extent.
The thing about being "lost", is that you don't realize you are, not until every inch of you craves for its normalcy. Until you find yourself completely stuck, unsure if to move forward or take several steps back.
Which is where I am now...
That place where the only thing I want, is to be exactly who I use to be.
I realized being lost leaves you completely empty and filling the void with all these things without substance. That the more I looked put together, the less I had it figured out.
It's only when you've reached this place that you begin to understand yourself more, mostly because you are forced to, if you want anything to ever be normal again...
So that's me right now...
Fully aware that I've created a beautiful...empty shell...
So I'm slowly trying to find myself, & a me filled with substance again...
even if that means taking a few steps back to retrace my steps.
even if that means accepting the things I have lost
even if that means acknowledging where I went wrong
even if that means shedding a few more layers before I find me...
the me I was trying to find in everyone else.
xoxo
-Signs the girl in search of a center.
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