Same Page...

One of life's many let downs is meeting someone and not being on the same page. Such a vital detail is being on the same wavelength in any successful relationship, be it friendship, a partnership, work or any ship in life. (But for the sake of this post we'll focus on intimate relationships.) Not being on the same page can determine absolutely everything moving forward.

How a story begins and ends is all determined on how well versed you are. Figuring out where someone stands is often not common knowledge in the very beginning. It takes some time of feeling a situation out and going from there. Truth is some people go in unsure what they want, they simply go along and find that out eventually. You can go into something not wanting anything at all, and end up getting so much from it, as you can also go into something wanting the world, and getting nothing from it. It's all trail & error.

You can't really blame anyone for not being on the same page as you, unless all throughout they claimed to be. Otherwise, you can't force anyone to be exactly where you want them to be...

You also run into circumstances in which you can't entirely pinpoint why something isn't full working out, where two people are seemingly seeking the same thing yet the cards aren't falling into place. This is where things get tricky... Often the desire for something to work means nothing if it wasn't meant to. You only acknowledge this when other things just effortlessly work... Not to assume that things are smooth sailing and the only requirement is for you to be on the same page, But the universe fights us tooth & nail when something isn't meant for us, we just have to listen to the signs... Just like the universe opens doors when things are suppose to work.

This isn't to say that you'll never be on the same page if you aren't intially, just saying it will be quite difficult to continue a book when you aren't initially. Someone is either going to rush to catch up, or someone else has to slow down to wait.

I guess the most difficult part of this, is watching those that weren't on your same page, be a perfectly written verse on someone else book...

xoxo
signs the girl seeking her verses...

New Year

33 days left in the year... 

While I'm aware that the concept of time is relative and arguable. I do often find myself extremely reflective this time of year. I look back on all the goals & plans I set for the year and how well I did or didn't. I take note of the lessons learned and the collective failures and accomplishments. The stories that began, those that ended. The new characters in my story and who I am today versus when the year started.

I must admit, 2016 was one of the better years I've seen in a long time. I'm grateful even for it's questionable moments. Goals were met, journeys were taken and my soul was filled. I started to work on a foundation I was ignoring for so many years now. I truly, geniuely focused on me and fixed the cracks that many years of negligence had created. I built with my future in mind, while still being focused on the present moment.

I met new people, dated, traveled, dieted, worked out, budgeted, focused...LIVED...

I originally wrote this post and had in mind listing all the amazing things that happened to me this year, along with my hard work & efforts...Then I realized that to be grateful you don't have to announce every single accomplishment. Those that know, do for a reason, and those that don't know, probably don't need to. That I can pat myself in the back and pop my own bottle of champagne, that my accomplishments don't grow or diminish based on who knows or doesn't. That often the things that fill our souls do not have to necessarily be shared. This too was part of the lessons learned in 2016. Every year is in fact another year of wisdom & knowledge. Another year filled with lifelong lessons and stories for days... If you have nothing to say about this year, then you likely didn't do much or didn't focus hard enough on the things the universe was showing you.

The year has 33 days left, and I'm sure in those 33 days I will continue to experience things, and I will have moments that change absolutely everything... or maybe it will be 33 conclusive days of 2016...

none the less, I will forever remember this year, as the year in which so much fell into place and I finally got some parts of my life together... SOME...

xoxo
signs the girl extremely grateful for 2016...

Not the one...

I've realized that probably one of the most difficult parts of a relationship ending is accepting that "you're not the one"... Realizing that yet again time was spent on something that wasn't concrete and wasn't meant to last. It's a mix of nostalgia for the times you'll miss, mixed with a heavy heart to know you'll have to start over. Jump into this journey of seeking that which your heart yearns for and deciding to take that risk yet again.

I've learned that there is in fact a difference between someone "not being into you" and "you just not being the one". Someone might in fact have all the feelings we classify as necessary for a relationship, but not always is it enough for the extra mile, the extra step, the extra hurdle...
Just, Not the one.

It's not an easy pill to swallow, it often comes with some self doubt, you kinda unknowingly start looking within yourself trying to figure out what you might have done differently. You try to figure out what is it about you that makes you, NOT the one. What traits about yourself you could have altered to make this work. When the reality is, nothing you could have done would change the outcome. Things not only work out due to effort, but just simple universal stars aligning and something just working out. We can't force anything in this life, including the outcome of something so personal as a relationship. Some people find out they aren't the one fairly early on, others years down the line... sometimes you're just not the one, anymore... Plenty of things could have been done differently, but that doesn't mean circumstances and the outcome would change.

Prolonging a situation that has already proven not to work, is a personal decision, people take the time they feel necessary to go through the motions of an extended farewell. But once you've accepted that something isn't going to work out because "you aren't the one" it must be acknowledged that the universe won't suddenly change things.

But I guess you also learn that you don't know much of anything... That as much as you try to apply logic to something as complex as feelings and relationships, you'll never really have the answer, or know what's next. That you can only cautiously try to apply the lessons you have learned and apply them to new circumstances... and hope for the best...

but you just never truly know...

xoxo
signs the girl trying too hard.